I read something today and I felt like someone had punched me right in the heart. It was just so filled with positivity and is reminded me how miserable I can be. I don’t know when I became such a worrier that I can never just enjoy the good because I’m always waiting for the other shoe to drop. It’s a pretty crap way to live and I’ve been trying this year to look for the good in life. I don’t want to be the one always looking for the cloud behind that silver lining!
I wonder if it’s because I’ve never really had anything super bad happen to me- I’ve never really experienced death. My grandparents have died but you sort of expect that. I had a fairly happy childhood and I always knew I was loved and wanted. I might have wished I was adopted or an only child but I think that was just teenage angst!
I’m drawn to happy people. They fascinate me and make me want to be a happy chipper person. I firmly believe it’s a good thing to surround yourself with people you like and admire and want to be more like. I don’t know what they get out of hanging out with me but I’m happy they do!
So I’m going to take the 5 things I obsess and worry over and turn them upside down into a positive. I’m expecting this to be really hard to do.
- I am proud of myself for having successfully lost 4 stone and have (for the most part) kept it off. It’s been 4 years since I started my weight loss journey. It wasn’t always easy and it sure as hell wasn’t quick but it certainly was worth it. So I’m cutting myself some slack and saying “well done me!”
- I worry about money all.the.time. I wish I had more of it. Don’t we all? But if I take a cold hard look at my life it ain’t so bad. We have a lovely house and a mortgage we can afford. We eat well and are surrounded by some of the prettiest countryside. Everything we have we own and we live well within our means. There’s something to be said for that.
- I have the best daughter in the world. That’s a fact. She’s clever. She’s kind. She’s affectionate and imaginative. I need to give myself some credit and her some slack.
- I worry about getting old. I never used to worry about it but the older I get the more I look at my crinkly lines around my eyes and mouth. They’re signs I smile and laugh too much so I’m going to embrace them.
- Friends. I don’t have too many so I like to keep the ones I do have but I constantly worry I’m going to offend them and they’re going to break up with me. It’s almost like having PTSD. I do hope that my friends know I love them to bits and would do anything for them. This is a good reminder to myself to tell them this more often!
There! I actually feel better!
Are you a silver lining sort of person or a cloud person? And can those of us who constantly search for that cloud behind that silver lining ever change? I’m surely going to try!
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